Shine on! Shan_____.

2009-06-15T18:10:00.002+08:00

搬家了！

moved to loveshanshine.wordpress.com

cya there!

goodbye blogger...

2009-06-13T23:09:00.005+08:00

its been a week filled with gatherings! its a happy week! =)

on monday, i met up with derrick to go shopping in town, and met marilyn for dinner!

on thursday, i met with cheryl and wanxin and pamela to go for shopping, dinner n hall productions. hall 11 production was really kudos. really funny. when i saw alvin lye on stage, i couldnt stop my laughter. but i still have to keep my laughter silent. its a chinese production. so its kinda weird to hear them speak proper chinese with some slang and emphasis.

on friday, i met up with huiling for shopping, then joined nina, daryl, mark and jinyong, my jc friends for dinner at cadele, raffles place. the food n desserts r REALLY nice. but somehow, the banana dessert taste lk rotten banana. but overall, the taste is still good. some of them changed for the better, some of them are just as good as the past, and ppl lk huiling is still as BLUR as ever. but i still love her since she gave me the boys before flowers ost. lol. its been half a year since i met up with these bunch of friends. but it remains so fun, laughable, joyful to be with them. hope i wont meet them too long later again. =)

today's day out with mummy and sis. i've been out for 2 consecutive nights, so its some time for my family! town's getting boring. but it still fascinates me with new interesting products.

alright. its TV time!

have a happy sunday folks!

sunday morning up with the lark, i think i'll take a walk in the park,
HEY HEY HEY its a BEAUTIFUL DAY!

2009-06-06T23:00:00.003+08:00

IM GG BALI!!!! =)
yes yes. after so much hardwork to put everyone's schedule together, getting the accommodation, flight and timings all right,
WE'RE FINALLY GG OVERSEAS TOGETHER!!!

today's family day with my maternal grandma, aunties and cousins.
nice chit chat, mahjong, dinner.

probably i still havent got over her departure.
i miss her from time to time.
i miss her voice and presence.
esp during the annual events when she'll always prepare our favourite food and be there.
now, its only the susan's version left.
like a saying go: until someone's gone, you'll never know how much u love/miss her.

so pls love your parents, grandparents, brothers, sisters, aunties, uncles and cousins.
esp those that you treasure, and those that dote on you.
don't start to regret only when they're gone.

then again, im missing you.
yet you never ever know.

2009-05-30T16:01:00.004+08:00

carnival carnival carnival.
omgosh. Ping Yi is 25 years old! but its history is sure more than that!
i was sitting on the benches with yl to wait for mum and dad, and it came to me that

although Ping Yi's no gem no crystal no bling no diamond, its just heartwarming and cozy.

yest i met an accident with a taxi. shant say who's fault it is. he say he's right. i say i'm right.
just count myself unlucky. to meet taxi uncle. i wouldnt wanna scream at him.

DRIVE CAREFULLY.
check blind spots.
don't dash through amber light/blinking light
don't exceed speed limit
observe lane discipline
2 second rule
watch out for where you're gg
N WHERE OTHERS ARE GG!!

2009-05-28T21:47:00.002+08:00

it's been more than a week since the cremation.
if i say i don't miss grandma, im cheating the whole world and myself.
i miss her so dearly.
absence makes the heart grow fonder.
i miss her presence. i miss her voice. i miss her tender loving care.

on another note, i've been idling for weeks.
left with nothing, nothing to do.
seeking jobs, and meeting many weird experiences and people.
exercising at home. killing time. drawing the extensive family tree.

and how many weeks more to school reopening?

2009-05-20T18:12:00.004+08:00

Grandma's gone to Heaven for good.

There's so many memories of her.
Everything that happened for the past 9 days was indescribable.
from home to hospital to her last breathe, last heartbeat
from day 1 to day 7 to cremation to ash collection.

WE MISS MAMA DEARLY.
Goodbye Mama.
Pls watch over the family.

Thank You friends that came to visit me, and pay grandma the last respect.

Thank You friends, relatives, and colleagues that helped our family throughout the wake and the whole way to cremation.

From the bottom of my heart,
a million Thank You.

I see everyone's hardwork to make this wake a success.
To let grandma have a glorious wake, and go to Heaven to meet grandpa.

MAMA, BYE BYE.

永在怀念中。

2009-05-13T00:00:00.002+08:00

it was an early-morning day.
fetched my maternal grandma and aunt to the airport for their trip to taiwan.

because of the episode of things tat happened, i didnt feel lk staying at hm, or bring alone.
so i called mary to join me at pp.
met xy at pp, and we soon headed to tamp.
suppose to have movies with chaijing.
i called daddy to check out grandma's conditions, and he said tat she's fine.
so we went on to get the tix.
shopped shopped walked walked laughed laughed.
mary picked up her phone...
its my mummy...
grandma wants to see us...
she say grandpa's bringing her away...
rushed home to pick up yl and to the office to pick up mum
and ZOOM, i went to the hospital.

because of H1N1, they only allow 2 visitor at a visiting time.
but bc of grandma's condition, we were allowed to visit her 2 at a time between the visiting hours.
slowing, we went up and down.
the whole family stood tgt to wait and queue to go up to see her.
the temperature screening was so stringent.
daddy, mummy, sis, and eldest aunt couldnt pass the test probably bc of anxiety and the surrounding temp where we all stood.
they had to gobble themselves with water, visit the toilet to cool themselves off.

finally, its my turn.
she didnt speak a word to me. she just looked at me.
i tried hard to show her a wide smile. but the mask just hidden it.
not long after, i went down to let the others go up to visit her.
stayed on at the lobby till ard 6 plus 7, and was told to bring yl home since she's got test tmr.

our own speculation, the doctor's speculation.
we don't know when she's gonna leave us.
she's shown many signs of leaving.
it aches to see her leave.
but we want her to be relief from the pain soon.

my heart is beating darn quickly now.
i recall the scene of awaiting grandpa's departure 2 years back.
my fear...

2009-05-11T23:22:00.002+08:00

the nights have probably been so long for her.
she's in pain. we can't feel it, but we hear it.
she's been on fever for 3 days.

my auntie, uncle came over to visit at seperate timings yest.
she didnt speak much. she spoke selectively.
my auntie teared to see her in such state.
my auntie visited my great grandma, who's also sick, in the afternoon.
great grandma says tat she'll leave tgt with grandma.
great grandma is still fighting on. she's brave and couragous. her memory is still very good.
but grandma is just lying there. counting her days.
auntie couldnt bear to ask her to leave with the Buddha if she sees him.
but it'll probably be better if she lives happily in heaven than suffer in bed.

she's grown even weaker today.
her stomach's bloated. she's getting breathless.
the whole family came to see her.
all the aunties teared.
she's still holding on... holding on...
the family's decided to send her to the hospital.
we only want to reduce her pain and suffering.

grandma, pls be strong, don't be afraid.
follow the Buddha to heaven, if you see him.

媽媽，你要坚强，不要害怕。
如果你看到菩萨，就跟他一起到天堂吧。

love...

2009-05-06T15:10:00.003+08:00

im glad i told them. at least i feel better.
thank you for listening and concerning.

ooozzz my. . . i have to find a job now. bad bad bad.

at least i get to take breaks now...

meh meh: pls finish ur paper quick so that we can go out! HURRY!!!!

dj mxs: there's 2 upcoming events! pls check ur emails and fb events to check out wat's coming up!

2009-04-24T23:20:00.002+08:00

it came totally unexpectedly.

it overturned my world.

it made a bad start for the holidays, n probably my life.

ill tell u guys when im ready.

when im ready...

when?

keep urself strong.
keep urself smiling.
have faith. faith. faith.

the shan will continue to shine.
wont she?
she will... she will...

2009-04-23T01:10:00.002+08:00

what can i say besides,

ITS END OF EXAMS!!!!

oh my!!! welcome to the 3 mths fantastic holiday!

ive got one of my task completed, tat's to watch MARLEY AND ME! lol.

more to come! ;)

n my dear girls and boys who r still struggling with tat demon name exams, he's gonna be away soon.

HANG ON THERE! just lk what i did!

moved everything out of hall today. the entire car was packed to the max bc i gave a fren and her stuff a ride back too! i guess the car had nvr felt so much weight before today. lol.
it had been a good 9 mths stay in hall, and well, ups and downs, good and bad, sweat and smiles, its been thru with me. plus my roomie, who will tell me some secrets, HT, and gossips.
met many new frens, they accompany me thru meals, study time, gossip time, lecture time, travelling time, and it was totally a good experience there! except for the times i feel home sick! plus those hall activities took up some time.

alright! time to go to bed!
this exam have made me suffer a good no of headaches and sleepless nites.

to my dearies, GOOD LUCK FOR UR EXAMS! u'll definitely do better than last sem.

the most hilarious conversation

2009-04-18T23:30:00.003+08:00

deRRick says:
hello
deRRick die liao la ...
got everybody status except mine ...
so in forest top secret liao la ..
lol
shanjoo says:
haha
it says recent news
u're still the same
so no news
lol
deRRick says:
i noe wat i wan for my birthdya le ....
shanjoo says:
errrr
pls do not tell me tat its smth more than 100 ok?!
deRRick says:
i told them le this year i wan u all save next year then buy me ....
lol
shanjoo says:
dots
so no wish this yr?
deRRick says:
but this year present cheap cheap .....
got ......
dun laugh arh ...
shanjoo says:
oh my....
ok
ready
deRRick says:
must put heart one arh .....
no blood or sweat i dun accept one arh ...
lol
shanjoo says:
OMG.....
still need blood
deRRick says:
i want a compo aboput me !!!!!!!!!
title i will think 1st
lol
shanjoo says:
i cannot stop laughing!
deRRick says:
i knew it !!!!
i told u dun laugh le ...
i msn yilian hit u arh
shanjoo says:
haha
omg
ur bday present may be the biggest joke this yr1
deRRick says:
lol ...
special ok ...
shanjoo says:
ya
v special
but, compo ah
deRRick says:
ya la ya la i wan lv la ...
lol
min 10000000000 words
i wan soft n hard copy
lol
no la ...
shanjoo says:
haha
omg
cannnot take it
i have idea for hard copy alr
deRRick says:
wat idea ...
shanjoo says:
DUN TELL U!
deRRick says:
no got time line one ..
hahahaha
oooi
shanjoo says:
huh
time line
deRRick says:
i wan fullscape one arh ..
lol
shanjoo says:
why so cheap skate?!
hardcopy use wat?1
scan ah!?
deRRick says:
wait la
idea there onli
must think one rite
deRRick says:
i think u all cannot write compo sia ...
like nth to write leh
hahaha
shanjoo says:
it depends on ur word count!
lol
deRRick says:
????
i topic is like saying my gd points
lol
at least thats wat i think ...
nvm la
u all gp pass hor ..
shanjoo says:
arhh...
ya
deRRick says:
u all go crack ur brain ...
lol
.
.
.
deRRick says:
shanJOOOOOOO
when u study tired liao hor ..
help me think of topic ....
shanjoo says:
haha
ok
i will
deRRick says:
I wanna hand out the question paper by 24 april ..
lol
shanjoo says:
k
.
.
.
deRRick says:
main pt ...
must be about me ...
sth i dunno ...
like maybe the topic is y r u friend with me ??? then ur ans cAN be like ....
cos i secretly had a crush on him ...
lol
sth along that line

-END-

omg! i seriously cannot stop laughing frm the moment he say he wants a compo about himself.
he sure is making good and meaningful use into this yr's gift theme "by request".

Don't Judge a Book by its Cover

2009-04-17T14:51:00.003+08:00

amazing and god gifted voice! don't judge by the looks, the figure, the appearance. many things are hiden under the veil.

be who you are. not what people judge your appearance to be.

Susan Boyle's even got a fan site now!
u can check out http://www.susan-boyle.com/

back to studying!

2009-04-11T00:46:00.005+08:00

she's getting her holiday to-do-list ready
she's preparing for her movie and drama marathon
she's preparing for her holidays and not for her exams
she's totally unprepared n she probably dont know a thing abt her exams
she's not getting her ass off to start studying

OMG. TELL ME TO STUDY.
NOT SLP OR LAZE AROUND!

2009-04-04T23:54:00.002+08:00

its been such a busy month, there's so much to do, so much to study, so much gg on.

and in 1 week, my exams r starting.
yet, watever i know abt my syllubus is probably only 50% or less.
hopefully my life will be better after 3 weeks!

sometimes, my brain tell me 1, my heart tell me 2. they sort of contridict.
like that thing is no good. n i know it. but after i leave it, i think about it.
stupid huh?!
watever! lol.

when i went hk, i missed fl's bday.
and days just flew that xy's bday is here and ova.
we got her a cake on a day we went for dim sum, before her bday.
and had another bday dinner after her bday.
we're just crazy, and ourselves together.

and oh my!
girls can curse n swear really well when they're in the car.
esp at the backside.

that's all for now. there would probably not be an update really soon.
maybe on some random exam day when im feeling stressed up.
or else, it'll be after the 22nd.

till then,
iloveuall
takecare
sleeptightalways
andsweetdreams

2009-03-19T18:12:00.003+08:00

im back!
the 4 days hk holiday was seriously tiring. but playing with the kids were fun! =)
totally wiped out alr. after i recover, ill have to start mugging hard for exam!

there's so much i wanna talk abt for the trip. but too tired. lets leave it for the next time!

the new darling's coming. so let's wave goodbye to my old sweetheart.
let the wind blow u away from me.

2009-03-14T00:12:00.002+08:00

there's a hundred different feelings in me now.

stress about school work

stress that exams are coming

trying to throw school work away so that i can enjoy the holiday

looking forward to flying off

irritated by the size of my bag

trying to knock you out of me

wondering why its happening in 1 day

anyway, im flying off soon....

bye spore, bye darlings, bye school, bye friends.

2009-03-13T02:31:00.002+08:00

its been a terrible week. very terrible. busy with all the project submissions. no rest at all. n finally, its thu, n im back hm!

the unluckiness that i get this week is unspeakable. but its all ova! =)

the only speakable thing would be girls nite out on wed! xy got a car since her uncle's out of town. but oh my... we ate crystal jade xiao long bao + steamboat at 11 plus at nite. this is so sinful. but it was sure good time. and the chit chat at jf's place was totally enjoyable. although i was abit emo (bc of stress, lack of slp n all), i enjoyed my time with them.

and a moral of the day (13/3). ITS GOOD TO SPEAK YOUR HEART OUT. when u've bottled smth for so long, n finally tell the person u wanna tell, OH MY GOD. it feels a ton lighter. trust me. say watever u wanna say. u'll feel good!
OK. I DIDNT DO A CONFESSION.

its really late! i need to complete some work tmr. n im flying off to hk on sat!

good bye my darlings.

2009-03-06T20:36:00.002+08:00

the excitement of collecting A lvl results...

i missed it last yr. but this yr, i represent NTU to go back to MJC to answer student's admission queries. N MARILYN CHOO WENT BACK TO KPO. lol.

it feels pretty exciting. brought the NTU admin officer ard MJ, popped by Perkafe, n THERE'S A POOL TABLE THERE! how amazing. there's also a pretty garden in the middle of the school.

the principal gave out results slips to 3A n 4A students. it took quite a while, n the top classes mainly dominated the applauses.

ppl who hugged for rejoice, cried and comforted each other.

-end-

i have so much work in front of me.

i miss singing
i miss outings
i miss movie
i miss shopping
i miss town

but ive lost quite abit of interest to travel all the way to town. seems far. (am i growing old? lol.)

can i have more time to complete by work. meet up with my friends. do the things i love. spend some good time with my family?

life life life. its 7 weeks more towards the long break.

2009-03-04T19:31:00.002+08:00

where shd i begin? ...

suddenly my group mates r all sending me projects to be discussed and completed.
added to the no of tuts i lack behind n have to complete for next week, OH MY....

time time i need time
i need to stay awake
i need to tell myself not to sleep so much

goodness....

2009-03-01T11:20:00.002+08:00

Went for the Symphonic Band Festival yesterday. OK. im not the "very musically incline" type who will volunteer to go for a band concert. it was to support the PYMB. though they only played 1 piece, its a step forward for them to present a piece on stage, infront of some few hundreds who do not know them.

oh my. is recess week gonna end? n i didnt accomplish anything this recess week. WELL DONE.

2009-02-25T21:19:00.004+08:00

can i stay in my castle, and not face the forest?
i know. it will nvr happen.

i miss my friends. i just wanna talk my heart out. about everything in life.
a good meal. a choco overload. talking out loud.

life doesnt always allow us to do wat we want to do.

2009-02-24T21:26:00.002+08:00

Was commenting in xy's blog, and wanted to find out the correct spelling of "ATAS". googled ATAS n i discovered this cool website.

http://www.urbandictionary.com

Let's check out some of the lingos. u'll sure laugh. ;)

ATAS

In Singlish, atas means "high class" - the word is derived fromt he malay word meaning "upstairs"

I don't like to go to all those atas places; surely spend money like siao!

All his friends damn atas one, you think they will go to that sort of low class place to eat?

Sleep Slut

One who sleeps frequently and is able to accumulate excess hours of sleep above beyond the mean. Sleep sluts are able to fall asleep indiscriminately and value sleep above all else.

Within minutes of boarding the commuter train Mark was fast asleep. Marks sleep slut powers were legendary in that he was always able to wake before his stop.

Singlish

2. Singapore's very own version of english. A much curt and impatient form of english for those that reside in this rat-raced cosmo city.

Example of a singlish term:"Don't talk cock lah you"
Talk Cock means to spew nonsense from one's mouth or to utter ridiculous contentions.

3. Singapore's English. A mixture of English with our local dialects.
skius: tellin' someone to give way. Short form of 'Excuse me'

alright. you can go check out the website for more interesting lingos.

ciao!

2009-02-23T23:00:00.003+08:00

after lady luck shone on me on vday for driving test, she somehow didnt stay for long and moved on to the next person.

monday of the horrendous week of 4 quizzes started really disastrously.

when i arrive in hall on monday morning (630 am!!), i realise i FORGOT TO BRING MY KEYS!!!! thinking tat MAYBE pamela will be in, i braced myself to knock on the room door. n NO ONE RESPONDED. i called her, and SHE'S STILL AT BEDOK STATION. oh my goddy... so pathetic me had to sit in the cold and silent tv lounge to study as i waitted for her. n for the entire day, we had to share a pair of key. thank goodness i got my keys on tue.

so monday, was alr a terrible start of the week. subsequently, the quizzes, burning midnight oil sort of drained me out, and made me look forward to thu.

friday was movie!!! ;)
it sets girls thinking... guys r jerks? lol.

if there's ever something greatest, bestest in my life, its my parents, sister and friends.

they always create the impossibles in my life.

happy birthday mei!

♥

2009-02-14T17:29:00.002+08:00

its a lucky day!

i passed my driving! ;)

wasnt really so lucky on the road.

but was lucky to get a really nice tester.

made several mistakes which he "open one eye, close one eye".

truly my best valentine's day gift.

next wk is horrendous week.

4 quizzes in 4 days.

oh my oh my.

i need luck to last me thru next week.

2009-02-12T00:28:00.002+08:00

in mandarin

"最重要是要有自信"

珊瑜，你的自信跑到那去了?
它似乎慢慢的不见了。。。
它似乎被埋住了。

把它找回来吧！

你们能帮帮她吗？

因为害怕，因为自卑，因为抗拒？

2009-02-10T14:09:00.002+08:00

im starting to have some difficulty finding smth to blog abt.

bc life goes on n on as usual, and nth special occurs in my life.

day in day out, life's a routine. anyway...

i was home yest to go do some praying. it feels nice to be home on a monday if not, EVERYDAY! and fortunately i dun have to take public transport to sch on tue morning.
when u're a hall stayer, u get deprived frm tv, proper meals, family time, meet up time. when u're home, u just wanna stay with your family. so probably this accounts for my unwillingness to go out of hm when im back sometimes.

driving test is coming AGAIN!!!!!!! ok. everyone, ATTENTION! pls pray for me on 14/2 or even earlier (YES! Valentine's Day! stop laughing! im not having a date with tp uncle). ive been pinning on the driving test for my dream, my reward. pls. fulfil it this time round.
for the first time, i thot it was fated.
for the second time, i know i have to depend on myself. and its no longer you.
for the third time, n definately final time, its gonna change it all.

friday meet up with djmxs
saturday driving test
tuesday HRM test
wednesday financial management & accounting test
thursday information technology test

i need luck to last me thru next week. ;)

2009-02-02T16:30:00.003+08:00

weekend was cool.

fri was dj mxs reunion dinner at my place, and we headed to marina aft tat. watched abit of chingay parade, and walked down to river hong bao, which was an utter disapppointment compared to any other yrs. just a lil display and a food str.

supposed to go K, but was turned down by the night rates. so it was THE WEDDING GAME instead. it feels lk watching a drama series. rating? 2- 2.5? comparable to LOVE MATTERS.

saturday was reunion w maternal relatives at my place. the lil kids went to K in the afternoon. i realised my sis n i r lk 88.3fm. we could sing almost all eng or chi songs selected. but yl's sure better than me at this.

hope this week will pass smoothly. my 1st driving lesson for the 3rd test is coming again. PLS LET ME PASS ON 14.2

wanna buy vday gifts?

check out vday11.blogspot.com for great vday deals!!!!

2009-01-24T14:21:00.006+08:00

HAPPY 牛 YEAR!!!

恭喜发财

心想事成

身体健康

福满财旺

学业进步

合家平安

牛年幸福开心

♥

Be blessed with goodness, happiness, prosperity, love, joy, peace, knowledge and wealth in the next year!

love, Shan Joo

im still doing my hmwk despite the preparation gg on. improvement indeed! =)

2009-01-19T21:16:00.002+08:00

i need some rainbow in hall.
it gets boring, lonely, and home-sick.
tutorials, tutorials, tutorials.
teleport me home please...
fear.

love myself like i love you.

2009-01-17T13:47:00.002+08:00

sem 2 week 2's finally ova.
this week had been full of adaptations; to new classmates, new acquaintances, new group mates.
still doing pretty well.

some things that are broken, cannot be mend easily.
so we have to look for ways to avoid seeing that wound.
bye bye.

yl's got her O lvl results. nth fantastic. got her stuck in the middle.
but hopefully, she'll be blessed n guided to the place she belongs.

love,
shanjoo

2009-01-09T00:22:00.003+08:00

do you know how it feels when a lizard dies in your cupboard, at an unreachable corner? and you have no idea if maggots or ants will come? or maybe the lizard is not dead, n its laying eggs inside?

do you know how it feels to be a floater for tutorial, seeing everyone else in cliques, knowing no one?

do you know how it feels when you come home, finding the things that u once arrange, rearranged? when those things in the left cupboard moved to the right cupboard. those things placed in front are placed at the back?

do you know how it feels when you told your maid to do smth, and come home after 4 days realising its undone, because your sister told her its quite impossible to be done? n guess what? you accomplished it in less than 10 minutes on your own.

do you know how it feels when your friend keep repeating things that r not so pleasing to the ear over n over?

do you know how it feels when u keep asking yourselves why you are carrying such a heavy bag taking train home, when you could have passed your driving long ago, and drive yourselves home?

do you know how it feels when you finally end the week at school, return home on a thursday and start planning good things for friday, when your mum come home to announce to you that u've got to go help out on friday?

do you know how it feels?

call me fussy shit, demanding, temperamental, picking on small things. but im JUST PISSED OFF! sometimes a small good deed in life can change someone's day for the better, and a bad deed can cause a super bad day? probably this just isnt my week.

im still clueless abt what to do with the lizard. i hope tutorials will get better; im trying not to think abt group allocation. ill get over what my maid have done in 1 night. i will forget how my friend pissed me off by this week. i will pass my driving this valentine's day. i will go for work tmr, and do it well n get over and done with it.

i will.

2009-01-03T09:43:00.005+08:00

oh my! we're alr in 2009! how time flies. thinking about the countdown to 2008, it just seemed lk yesterday.

had a simple & heart-warming bday celebration with dj mxs + roomie (the special guest) at suntec for steamboat.

presents?

a black guess watch from my sis
a blue striped bag from dj mxs + roomie
a bling hair clip frm aunt

my sister wrapped the present in 2 wrapping paper + 9 newspaper. that surely made me tear the paper like crazy. n she attached a note with every newspaper.

i'll upload the pictures of the presents n bday ltr.

2008

its been a yr with many things happening.
working, travelling to many different places, A level results, Uni.
Many things have changed. Some remain unchanged.

2009

new year new hope new resolutions.
hopefully some things that are meant to be changed will change.
and good things shall remain the same.

did i just ask jf how's her grand dad on post christmas and new year? we even said that he's seen thru 2008. yesterday morning, he passed away. May jf's ah gong Rest in Peace, meet the angels and have a smooth journey to heaven, and bless the family with goodness and happiness. ♥

school's gonna begin officially on monday. im gonna start lect on tue. it makes me afraid. i dont know what im afraid off. but i guess its working hard towards my gpa, meeting new classmates, staying away from home more than half the week and continueing to adapt to uni life thats scaring me. i should have wished for more courage on my bday. if i've ever been couragous, i need that lion to come back. because that mouse is grasping me harder and harder.

hello 2009!

2008-12-31T13:42:00.002+08:00

anyone recall that staircase glass table at my old place? i name it the cinderella table; bc the steps look like those in the fairytale where cinderella dropped her glass shoes.
anyway, its broken, and can't be fixed anymore. i lived with it for 8 years of my life.
admired it, used it, studied on it.
oh wells. goodbye cinderella table.

my aunt shares the same birthday as me. and today, we(me n yl) gave her the presents we prepared. Chanel COCO MADEMOISELLE & Estee Lauder Intensive.

took us such long time to decide wat to get. the perfume is so nice, i wouldnt mine getting it as a present too. lol. it makes me really happy to give someone smth i love too!

alright. i've got to go back to work!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!
2009 WILL BE A BEAUTIFUL YEAR! ;)

2008-12-29T13:23:00.005+08:00

class gathering on sat was successful! ;) finally the 2008 gathering is settled n ova.

no concrete plans. no activities. just chit chat. it was a good time for food n sharing; knowing a lil more abt each other lifes.

christmas exchange with dj mxs was exciting. sweet gifts, cute gifts, beautiful gifts. but marilyn's gift was the scariest. lol. n my pillow is nice! :)

headed down to clarke quay after that. i know this sounds totally mountainous. but its my 1st time there. nice place for drinking n chilling. we were suppose to go there bc derr wanted to take photo of central's xmas tree. it turned out to be a lil disappointment.

its really convenient to travel around in cars. n i swear by that since im born. lol.
2 cars made it even better! just that getting lost on the road is really irritating. its fun to sit in ur friend's car, sing out loud laugh and chit chat.

checked my results today. totally nth fantastic. all Bs. so its 3.5

3 more days to 2009! its time for new year resolutions!

love, shanjoo

2008-12-26T21:54:00.001+08:00

let it be brought away with eighteen...

goodbye.

2008-12-24T10:27:00.003+08:00

merry christmas!
have a great week ahead!

♥, shanjoo

2008-12-19T17:06:00.002+08:00

S I C K
S I C K
S I C K

oh my... pls let me recover before party starts!

santa claus! do you know what i want for christmas?

2008-12-18T14:09:00.004+08:00

still working n working everyday.

band rod and sentosa trip is way overdue (2 weeks ago?)

2008-12-08T00:05:00.002+08:00

whole weekend was a bang.

fri evening was four christmases. a heart warming and funny movie.

sat was bugis and rod in heels. oh my! tat poor lil feet hurt.
it just feels weird to mix with a group of people whom u're neither close nor stranger to. esp when everyone's in cliques. but it always feels good to go back to look at your sister pass down, and watch the band grow better and hopefully stronger each time. and meet people who u used to laugh and have fun tgt.

sun was sentosa day!!! ;) too tired to upload pictures now.
cycling (and once again, i fell), sky ride, luge, lunch, beach. packed with fun and laughter. a different outing compared to the others. and marilyn, GOOD JOB! =)

rushed back to join family for some event after tat.

im feelin sort of confused, frustrated and pissed off. with myself? with others? i dont know.

im quite a family person. so i can be quite pissed off with meetings or activities held on sun or p.h. i dunno how the others feel. but can we leave weekends and ph to our families?

yet, there was suppose to be meeting and camp on mon (tmr, hari raya haji). that holiday's definitely not related to me in any way. but its a ph. so cant we break free from some formal work?

probably bc i lead a different life from most; i always have to work throughout school holidays. so holidays arent really holidays for me. and especially when dad n mum work thru day and night, i specially treasure and reserve my weekends and ph for family. yet, some other activities (compulsory attendance/ oblige to attend) must be held on weekends or p.h.

do such activities really help to raise the portfolio? do the friends you meet from such activities really become part of your social circle or connection that you can work with or use when you go out to work? do these activities really turn out to become fruitful?

im not anti-social. but if it takes you so much commitments that u'll have to give up weekends, family time, then issit worth it?

actually this isnt the 1st time im meeting such a question/ problem with understanding leaders or people who work n meet thru holidays. but somehow, i've figured that probably everyone's priorities are different. so obviously, views are different.

and im facing a contridiction. its smth i like. smth im passionate about. but it just seems that the people are not right.
it used to be enjoyable. but now, it becomes dreading, awful and a waste of time.
i signed up for it. so i feel obliged to go.
yet, ive got work commitments with mum (who i cannot afford to make her nag), and myself. and since its starting to dread me, i've decided to go against my obligation, and not go for it.
i feel bad. but i know ill feel worst for not turning up for work, leaving early, and feeling miserable if i go.

up till today, after 1 sem have passed, im still confused abt many things and decisions that i've made. yet, i think i shd treat myself better.
FOLLOW MY HEART.
and i hope that ill be right.

good night.

2008-12-04T15:36:00.006+08:00

once again, i failed...
dont ask me why. becos i have no idea too.
probably im too nervous, trying to meet everyone's hope.
my leg started shaking like crazy. after the tester asked me to stop and relax at the slope, it became better.
minor mistakes here and there, plus 1 strike kerb at s course.
crack course went fine this time.

i guess, i totally have no luck today.
everything went wrong right from the start of the lesson.
in circuit, nth went right.
when going back to driving centre for test, i almost knock on the pavement.

next test in feb. if im gonna take the saturday test, most probably it'll be on 14/2.
oh well. hope that will be my last driving test.

phobia developing for driving test.
or have i already have phobia since the first test?

... ... ...

2008-12-03T17:21:00.001+08:00

not dead.

but working everyday. eewwww.

driving test is tmr!!! =

2008-11-30T12:21:00.002+08:00

countdown 4 more days to 2nd driving test.
i will pass. wont i?!
-_-"

2008-11-26T20:51:00.002+08:00

i, hereby declare, END OF SEM 1!!!!!
n I SURVIVED IT!!!!!!!

woohoo! exams are finally over.
though it didnt have a good end (becos stats was totally screwed up),
im happy that its all finally ended, and im back to this lovely house,
WITH A CHRISTMAS TREE!

looking forward to meet ups, gathering, shopping, christmas, new year, and of course BIRTHDAY!!! ;)

wat's more than shouting HIP HIP HOORAY!!!!!!!!!!

2008-11-24T00:10:00.003+08:00

welcome home JOELLE! :)

its definitely sweet to be finally home!

n HEWYENN will be back home in hours!

i havent started much for stats when the paper is on wed.

im in such deep shit once again.

oh well. who to blaim?

i deserve it. for slacking and having fun for so many days.

when 2.30pm strike on wed. . .

freedom belongs to me me ME once more.

2008-11-18T11:06:00.000+08:00

SHIT IT!

MARKETING IS "OH MY GOSH!"

argh...

2008-11-13T15:58:00.000+08:00

Happy 19th Birthday Marilyn! =)

The 15 Commandments- from ELLE Nov 2008 edi.

2008-11-07T13:24:00.002+08:00

Thou shalt reinvent thyself- change ur haircut, throw out that old lipstick, take on the latest fashion trend.. but always on your own terms

Thou shalt be comfortable

Thou shalt renounce the trends and all its stereotypes (but shall stay informed and instead be wondrously and beautously thyself)
Thou shaltnever break the rules of sisterhood

Thou shalt not douse thyself wih frangrances- a signature scent should linger when you've left a room, not herald your arrival with a loudhailer, before you even come round the corner

Thou shalt learn to love your hair- the right haircut is the one that allows you to rush and run

Thou shalt dance

Thou shalt embrance the art of retail therapy

Thou shalt appreciate the ordinary, but pursue the extrodinary

Thou shalt always have time for a girls' night out

Thous shalt always eat chocolate

Thou shalt not let your makeup wear you

Thou shalt travel

Thou shalt indulge

Thou shalt party like a rock star

have you got them all the 15 commandments down a paper? revise them everyday! =)

exams time! so back to the books. its truly madly deeply been long long time since i open up the text n read.

last last and last

2008-11-04T00:36:00.005+08:00

finally, marketing module is all ova n done with. now its only down to the final written paper. =)
what initially was a group lunch, turned out to become a tutorial class lunch cum class rep bday lunch @ NTU executive cafe.

take 1

take 2

it's always fun to have all around! :)

initially, i thought that failure was a chance or fate.
but it was actually fate to let me understand that its not a chance.
it was to tell me the truth and bring me back to reality.
i've understood.
its time i put a fullstop.
time to say goodbye.

my next attempt will definately be a success.
otherwise, ~~i may kill myself.~~ lol.
i wouldn't give it a chance or say its fate again.

episode on washing n drying clothes

2008-10-29T13:57:00.002+08:00

omg! the weather is so good today! perfect for washing n drying my clothes!!!!!

gosh! this is totally auntie spirit.

but when i have no choice (i still bring some home to wash of course!!) but wash my laundry in hall, this is the spirit it cultivates in me man.
lookin' out at the weather, crossing my fingers to hope tat it doesn't rain when i wash my laundry.
sometimes, i can be so lucky that once i wash, it starts to rain. bad luck.

but it looks like today's weather is good! :)

2008-10-26T17:57:00.004+08:00

life goes on and on as usual.
except for tat lil spies in hall life.
all the late nights talking crap. (its making me crazy though)

studying is BOOOOOOO.
quizzes are PUIIIIIIII.
EXAMS? dun talk about it.

but good news is that the 7hrs i spent before that disastrous driving test paid off. A for tat assignment! =)

i actually didnt realise tat uni life is THIS SHORT, till i was told. lets see...
SEM 1 (aug-dec): study 3 mths, exam 1 mth, break 1 mth.
SEM 2 (jan-aug): study 3 mths, exam 1 mth, break 3 mth.

so in all, we have study 6 mths, exam 2 mths, break 4 mths.
does this figures make uni life not so bad aft all?!
though we study n get screwed real hard for 6 mths, we get to rest for 4 mths!!!!!
that makes me slightly happier! bc i cant find any job on earth tat gives me 4mths of holidays. n tat excludes public holidays and long weekends! (unless i become taitai or smth)

enjoy this lil long weekend folks.

im feelin' lucky this week. ;)

2008-10-19T21:22:00.005+08:00

a purpose in life...

what's my purpose of life?
what's my aim?
what's my goal?
what's my dream?

marilyn reminded me about purpose.
suddenly, i realise there isnt a purpose to my life. or have i forgotten my purpose in life?
why am i in uni?
why am i doing accountancy?
why am i living?

what's yours?
i think i need to rethink about mine.
because, i think i've lost myself in this journey of pursuing purpose in life.

im no longer who i used to be.

and if you mean something to me, do i mean something to you?

+++

shanjoo says:
u really struck me to ask myself wat's my purpose in life
shanjoo says:
perhaps i lost my purpose in life
Marilyn says:
hahahaa...
Marilyn says:
go find back can le lor.
Marilyn says:
its not that hard =)

i will go back to find it.

2008-10-16T15:55:00.002+08:00

it was totally a disastrous way home.

the fallen tree blocked the way for bus to go out.

2008-10-12T18:48:00.002+08:00

bye joelle! we'll miss u lots in town. but its just another 41days. =)

accompanied grandma to her past-time gambling place in the afternoon.

i always imagined tat place to be smokey, dark, n full of auntie uncle. (just like what the tv shows)

but it was a clean bright place with just a few old uncle auntie trying to seek leisure.

booked my driving lessons. retaking on 4th dec.

the thot of crank course n s course kerbs like shivers me.

i also dont know what im thinking.

sometimes yes. sometimes no.

but its totally not up to me to decide.

so, whatever.

not looking forward to the presentation full monday ahead.

i just wanna fly to holidays.

2008-10-11T12:44:00.002+08:00

DJ MXS @ My Secret Gardens & Mind's Cafe

Bon Voyage Joelle aka HENG HENG! ;)

we'll miss u in town!

♥

2008-10-07T17:20:00.001+08:00

afa afa afa afa afa afa afa.

it sounds like a cartoon animation to me...
but its from the relief stats prof.
he just makes me laugh uncontrollably. =)
in actual fact, its ALPHA!
lol.

2008-10-06T19:09:00.004+08:00

project. presentation. project. presentation.

presentation. presentation. presentation.

now its making me sick.

i thought i used to love it. =(

everytime i hope the one i c is you.

maybe bc im just too lazy.

pls fly me to sem break now!

2008-10-05T22:54:00.003+08:00

Ministry of Food (MOF) a Japanese Restaurant at Marina Sq and Bugis.

Went to the bugis branch on sat. yummy yummy. its good! =)

fresh sashimi. great ambiance. nice fittings. valued price.

gosh. school's starting again... =(

2008-10-04T11:09:00.002+08:00

finally weekend is here again!!! ;)
there must be a thousand stars shining on me! i got my carplate no!

2008-10-01T21:20:00.005+08:00

super nice family's day out! =)
the grandmas, the sisters, the siblings, the cousins, the children. everyone's enjoying this children's day n hari raya puasa!

selemat hari raya adilfitri!

HAPPY HOLIDAYS EVERYONE! ;)

2008-09-29T08:21:00.004+08:00

she finished a 10h marathon on friday morning without sleep just to finish that assignment.

she strike n mount kerb in the driving test.
she totally didnt expect such stupid things to happen to cost her a pass, a license, a car.

she stood on those heels in hsbc f1 event @ ink club bar, fairmont hotel.
she was attached to a model who looked lk angelina jolie. pretty. =)
she enjoyed all the food after the event.
she went home with all the aches on the leg.

she loves to spend time with her family.
she doesnt want to do back to school to face all that shit.

she fears the stats quiz.
she isnt even studying for it.

i want my holiday. i want my life. i want home. i want grandma to recover.
i want you. no. probably i dont. i dont know...

she's confused. by everything there is in life.
care to give a hand?

2008-09-26T02:11:00.002+08:00

she never learns her lesson till the minute she dies.

now, she's in deep deep shit.

though she knows it'll be over somehow, its a critical 9hr she have to pull through between sleeping and finishing the shit that takes up 20% of OB&D.

im yanking rubbish.

2008-09-24T10:39:00.003+08:00

permed my hair! alright. just norm. a lil addition to the straight hair i guess. =)

meetings, assignments, quizzes, driving test. thats all i have this recess week.

2008-09-19T22:46:00.003+08:00

bored of this blogskin...
ok. some of you may think "finally she's bored of it. I'VE LONG BEEN SICK OF THIS!!!"

but nth seem to catch my eye in blogskins.

somehow, i love the no. 18

2008-09-18T21:25:00.002+08:00

driving like a blind man today. no control. poor estimation. hit kerb 3 times. stall uncountable times. ARGH! i thot 18 is my lucky day. but apparently not.

wrong signal correct signal? i also have no idea.

2008-09-16T23:43:00.002+08:00

MAF celebration at home! :) siglap linear park is such a good place for strolling.

finally! last day of school tmr for mid-sem! 1 wk recess break! but business students have to work harder for projects, quizzes and case studies. sadis

2008-09-15T21:01:00.002+08:00

holding on... although im almost breathless to do so.

i chose the path. i cant regret.

there's probably smth tougher than this. but currently, this is the toughest.

school is seriously crazy. pls bring me home.

2008-09-14T14:08:00.002+08:00

woke up early early on sat morning to get back to hall to paint banner! =)

its quite stupid of me to try out another bus route (thinking tat it'll go my hall). in the end, i took a bus trip ard ntu, then go out. so i had to stop n go opp to change bus to go in again. n walk 10 min back to hall. RETARDED...

painting banner with the blk ppl is FUN! ;)

STEAMBOAT! (tks to fang mum) SOCCER, MAHJONG, MOONCAKE, LANTERN. CHIT CHAT TO 3.

there's no way i can't love ♥ them more... ;)

中秋节快乐！

HAVE A MEMORABLE MID-AUTUMN FESTIVAL! =)

2008-09-12T15:34:00.003+08:00

more dnd photos! :) tks to facebook, we can all share pictures and collect pictures with our faces easily!

inspiration last night...

if u've watched mamma mia, n it havent made u feel back to the past, or if wall-e havent made u feel make to childhood, probably u can try out my idea! just had a sudden spur of inspiration to try out the forward roll we've always done during pe in primary school. rmb the blue mat? the pe teacher will make us do forward n backward roll on the mat! n i tried it on the bed! totally fun! lk a mini blood rush! esp when i almost fall off the bed. =) this may sound stupid n retarded. but if u're feeling stressed out, or sad, probably u can try it. it'll make u laugh n feel back to the old school times.

BRING OUT THAT INNER CHILD IN YOU. don't always put up that strong front. we can have fun as long as we want to!

gonna watch wall-e ltr! according to a senior, it's heart-warming n lk back to childhood! the way he decribed it, makes the show sooooo irresistable. i'll watch n tell u all! ;)

if i have to enjoy my life, its probably when there's a mixture of work n fun! n its now. (but sometimes, work can get so overwhelming...)

im no longer bluffing myself. but its when i will tell the truth, or when u will ask me to tell the truth. i'll tell you.

HAVE AN ENJOYABLE MID-AUTUMN FESTIVAL!!!
(i realise DJ MXS always gathers during MAF)

2008-09-10T23:22:00.007+08:00

the week had been busy busy busy in school. 3 day wk is no fun. but thank god, IM HOME! its nicer to take a car home! =) nevertheless, floorball rekre on tue had brightened up the day. nice sweat-it-out time!

friday's dinner out with nina, hl, daryl n mark was lk long time catching up. i finally get to c daryl n mark, 9 mths aft graduation, =) army have deprived daryl from some part of life, that makes him more retarded now; JUST LIKE ME!

dnd on sat had been nice. it was more lk a pageant show. pretty girls, handsome guys. for the rest of us, its lk a mini og gathering. talk talk eat eat watch pageant show. plenty of photoshots of course. =)

evidence of hardwork till 3+ in the morning!

zorro! =)

that's all for now!

have a happy weekend! ;)

2008-09-02T18:45:00.004+08:00

yenn yenn's farewell dinner at bugis last nite. =) a nice farewell dinner, cum gathering for all the girls. they're still the best!

2008-08-28T01:01:00.003+08:00

its been a really busy busy week.
proj, tutorial, meeting, proj, tutorial, meeting. packing everything into 3 days is craziness.
now im back hm! n im suppose to complete next week's stuff over the weekend, shop for dnd, go for driving lessons, n live on w life. gosh!
n tat 1.5h journey hm can indeed be very dreading. falling aslp n waking up thru out tat 50min train journey is shit.
daddy, come back quick! car, why cant u move on ur own, n bring me home? =(

didnt get into the jam band or emcee club. only felt abit pity.
(to me many things in life have just been planned/ fated)

grandma was admitted into hospital again last sat. xy n marie witnessed the entire process. i've told myself to stay calm. she's back hm alr. now everyone's got to always keep a look out for her. everything happened so quickly, no one was prepared in any way.

recurrence? it doesn't have to happen like that; but somehow, it always does.
its neither like pushing a kid up a swing, nor pulling her down when she's on top.
it just makes her confused why she isn't moving on the swing.
(Abstract)

enjoy the coming weekend! =)

2008-08-19T18:44:00.002+08:00

hey hey! =)

uni life is just busy busy busy. lots of reading, slow grandpa profs, n non stop activities 24h around the clock. it sort of freaks ppl out abit. i can feel tat stress lvl UP THERE by wk 2 alr.

went for jam band n emcee club auditions yest n today. jam band auditions wasnt very gd bc my voice is abit off w the cough. auditions for emcee club was alright. still can handle; but its abt being selected i guess.

super misses dj mxs! but we'll be meeting on fri!!! :)

till then, have a beautiful week everyone!

2008-08-15T22:49:00.004+08:00

everything in school had been fine.
just that being in different tutorial groups for all the modules makes me feel so left out for the 1st tutorial.

SIS GOT A1 FOR HER CHINESE!!!!! cant imagine her standard can be so good right? i bet the examiner was tired of marking, so he/she just tick instead of cross (less strokes).

i washed my clothes in hostel using a washing machine for the 1st time in my life.
according to pamela, i just had to press a few buttons.
when i went down, i attempted to press a few buttons. but nth seem to work. it doesnt even seem on! so i had to shout for pamela to come rescue me! i know im darn stupid. but ya! 1st time ok?! its an accomplishment under pamela's influence to go wash my clothes on my own alr! but i still brought it home for ironing. =) i wouldnt wanna create a hole in my shirt.

the table tennis game this aft between spore n south korea had been a very exciting game! esp since im a singaporean! ;) caught it on tv mobile on the way home, n marilyn msg-ed me to watch so i could update her.

started watching frm the second match: Li Jiawei (spore best, world no 6) VS Kim Kyung-ah (south korea best, world no 11). li jiawei had everything she needed. but she was probably too tensed. so we lost.
the game was so tensed for me, i had to take a break (n go bath).
missed the 3rd match (doubles) where spore won, and i returned in front of the tv for the 4th match.
by then, the overall tally was 2:1 w/ spore in the lead.
i would think that the 4th match was not a very good game, n we lost. so it became 2 all.
5th match was the deciding match as to which team will get into the finals, clinching either the gold or silver medal. Feng Tianwei (spore, world no 9) VS Park Mi-young (s.k.) was the most exciting game thru-out the 3hr++ match. not just because it was the deciding match, but bc the players really played well. beautiful game! at some points, i didnt even dare to blink my eyes, in case ill miss tat critical swift shot. finally came a 9:10 match point game w/ spore leading, where Park made a fault in her serving, bringing spore into the 2008 Beijing Olympic Table Tennis Female Team Finals.

Kudos to Team Singapore! It was indeed an impressive game. the South Koreans played well too. some ppl may think tat there's nth to be proud abt since they r foreign talents bought over at the cost of simply money. but my opinion is that:
if it wasnt that spore provided an opportunity for them, giving them lotsa training, polishing them into world top players, where would we even find a representative to go into olympics table tennis? its Spore's Effort that shaped them into who they are today. so, wouldnt the glory be ours? why wouldnt you be proud that Singapore groomed stones into diamonds? it can be very difficult to find a stone in a small lil population of less than 3m pure Singaporeans. so pls be proud that u're a Singaporean, be proud that we're able to cut stones into diamonds, be proud that the people that we've groomed are bringing us in the Olympics finals.

ALL THE WAY SINGAPORE!
MAJULAH SINGAPURA! (ONWARD SINGAPORE!)

2008-08-11T22:03:00.001+08:00

pamela's out.

suddenly, i feel homesick.

I MISS HOME...

exploring the different food in different canteens can really be interesting. you just feel like eating everything at 1 shot!

2008-08-09T12:00:00.003+08:00

some pictures taken from camp n zouk out (joint hall bash)

hopefully more pictures to come! =)

sore throat cough and running nose is driving me NUTTY!!!

HAPPY 43rd BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE!!!

2008-08-07T15:09:00.006+08:00

school have officially started! n im super blessed to be granted a 3-day timetable. :)
wanted to do my GE this sem. but ntu ppl r just too KS. in 2 hrs time, almost all the electives have been taken. ALL THE WAY FOR SHOWING THE S'POREAN SPIRIT MAN!

nth more interesting in my life except new things lk uni n hall life. still trying to try all the food from different canteens. nth special in my hall's canteen. so we have to venture out for good food! =)

n im super in love with the magic cleaner! the room gets dusty so easily.

im home on wed! sister is forever irritating. but when im away, perhaps she'll learn to miss me more. haha.

2008-08-03T00:26:00.003+08:00

im back frm hall camp!! ;)

foc had been totally tiring n i have bruises all over. will upload the pictures when i get the cd. in anyway, its been a PACK OF FUN! Hall 11 n Zorro. =)

and below's the s412 gathering!

i miss DJMXS! im sorry im so packed for the past week. life had just been to overwhelming. it hasn't stopped spinning since i stopped working. it just went spinning faster n faster.

2008-07-26T16:21:00.002+08:00

xy/ marilyn: Don't the email look like a response to our conversation?

i don't usually open up these mails. but bc this heading seemed particularly interesting, i wanted to see what it is about.

2008-07-24T23:51:00.002+08:00

a pretty meaningful advert i saw before the movie started.

dear marilyn,
i really feel alot better after talking. although i don't know what to say, and i may just be bubbling some rubbish, i really feel so much better. Thank You so MUCH!

Umbrella girls will nvr be alone. can we add 1 more person under the umbrella? haha.

love, shanjoo

2008-07-24T22:18:00.002+08:00

watched the dark knight with xy n marilyn this aft. it was a nice meeting with them. i always love their company bc they just know me too well.

visited grandma ltr in the evening. thank you girls for accompanying me till cousin came.

this is probably gg to be the quietest and most fearful night.
i've nvr felt so fearful in my life before.
i don't know how school ppl will be like.
i don't know how hall camp will be like.
i don't know how staying in hall will be like.
i don't know how missing mummy daddy meimei n everyone else would be like.
i don't know how missing grandma will be like.
i don't know how strong i will stay.

i really don't know...

im sorry folks. but probably i'll get over it soon.

please bless grandma with speedy recovery. please...

2008-07-23T23:48:00.003+08:00

had a rather humorous conversation with xy and marie (forced to edit...) last night. i think i was mainly the joker thru out. i just cant stop being retarded when im with them. it just flows naturally.

n "animals" is just an illustration. i very much wouldnt lk to be a lion u know?

N EVERYONE, I OFFICIALLY DECLARE THAT I'M NO LONGER WORKING!!!! ;)
although there are still some task i have to finish up, i no longer have to commit myself to the 830 time. happy happy! had a lil farewell lunch planned by the others. there's presents too!

these 8 mths had been my longest time spent inside. n i've indeed learnt alot more than i've ever did. though it just looks lk a lil MISS PRINCESS seat, it doesnt always seem as easy as it is, especially when KING & QUEEN dont treat me lk PRINCESS there. more like a slave of the servants. haha. this is abit exaggerated. but its tough to be working for urself when u set high expectations n uphold a "cannot fail" spirit. but this had indeed been a memorable 8 mths. n a certificate for myself to proof that my determination can go far if i wanna get something done; something that i've probably nvr pushed myself so far when im in school. just imagine me pushing myself beyond whatever i've ever done in school. abit lunatic alr.

grandma's admitted into hospital again. this time round more serious. we just wanna pray that the doc's diagnosis is wrong. it makes my uber confused now. esp when i think abt my bad dream last night
Please do not bring her away from me when i've just learnt to love n treasure her more than ever in my life.

gg for movies with the girls tmr. hopefully it'll help bring my worries n all away for awhile.
i need to pour everything out from my brain. ABIT OVERFLOWING.

2008-07-22T18:18:00.002+08:00

I FINALLY BROKE MY "STALL ONCE A LESSON" CURSE!!!!!

fancy me breaking the curse on rainy day compared to normal driving conditions. How weird!

i've been telling myself throughout the lesson "CANNOT STALL. CANNOT STALL" haha.

please don't let me ever stall again!

:)

2008-07-20T16:23:00.004+08:00

had driving lesson yest aft lk 20 days of absence (im just too busy w/ work for the past 20 days). pretty jerky at 1st, but better at the ltr part. BUT I STILL CANT BREAK THE "STALL ONCE A LESSON" CURSE.

went IKEA w/ dad mum n sis to shop for cups for the office. but we all ended up buying plentiful more. the bill added up to $383.95. n the most expensive was probably a DUSTBIN for the toilet; $29.00!!!! i think we were just too blind. but shopping at IKEA had been lotsa fun!!!!

N ladies n gentleman, IM IKEA'S friend!!!! haha.

display name: SH@NJ% (they coundnt do it in small letters)

when i went shopping with nina n hl on friday, we came across the NTUC sneaks sale or smth. bought the small hello kitty containers w biscuits @ S$1.50. they were meant for my colleagues as farewell gift.

decided to put their names on it, n then, i BLING-ED it.

and yes! my grad cert! haha.
PS: dear friends, rmb to go back to collect from 9 to 430 mons to thus, (n by 4 on fris)
bring IC along!

and that's our sushi feast on mon!!!! we're so hungry that we have to take a TABLE full of sushi.

2008-07-19T00:05:00.002+08:00

its always nice to be with friends!!!! ;)

went to collect grad cert (or file) w/ hl n nina. it was nice chit chatting, shopping, sharing, teaching session. haha. no matter how long i dun c them, somehow, there's still unless topics to talk about! GIRLS! WHAT TO EXPECT?! loves...

sch clerk is still very very irritating. SHE NEVER FAILS TO IRRITATE ME! no wonder she's in mj. bc she nv fails... -_-" (P.S. OPPS! retardivity is hitting my head! sorry!)

anyway, IM GONNA OFFICIALLY BE JOO (not JANE) in the JUNGLE! (no TARZANS plz... ) gonna be staying really near forest. n VERY FAR from my school!
dear pammy,
we'll have happy time walking to school...

isnt it frightening to think that sch is starting in 2wks?!

2008-07-13T13:30:00.002+08:00

IM SH*TTY-ly TIRED!!!!!!

hi hi folks! i arrived in spore frm msia yest. the entire trip is all about meetings meetings meetings. only had lk 2-3 hrs of shopping (thankfully there's a mall in the hotel)

the day b4 i left for msia, i asked mummy if there's anything near the hotel. mummy just told me, 7-11.

when i arrived, guess what i discovered? PYRAMID SHOPPING MALL!!!!! wth! she's been staying in sunway lagoon, n yet she doesnt know! guess, esprit, topshop n all. there's even ice-skating at the basement! mummy just blamed daddy for not giving her time to shop. HAHA.

n sunway lagoon is WOW! haha.

grandma's home frm hospital on wed. everything's good! :)

2008-07-07T17:31:00.002+08:00

the office finally had new phone sets after we've worked with a few pathetic phones for a few weeks. don't you think it looks lk some electrical shop selling telephone? ;)

went town with derr xy marilyn on sat. its my 1st day in GSS! suppose to buy a bag n watch WANTED. but apparently, i spent lk $300++. bag, PJ, shorts, pullover, skirt.
I ♥ sales!!!! :)))

WANTED is violent, vulgar, ... arrrrrr. i think you wouldnt be able to count the number of times they say f***. UNCOUNTABLE. n Angelina Jolie is SOOOO pretty. totally gorgeous!

went town again on sun; sis wanted haircut. n i spend lk another $$$ on bling rings. JOO'S splurging abit too much....

grandma- the one that quite smoking, is just admitted in hospital. the doc say that one side of ur lungs is filled with water. MAY BUDDHA BLESS GRANDMA, PLEASE. gg to visit her ltr.

gg msia frm thu to sat.

2008-07-01T23:14:00.002+08:00

my ez-link card couldnt work when i board the bus today!!! i tried n tried (bc i couldnt believe that my card couldnt work). went to the ticket counter, and i was told that it's EXPIRED! its either i keep the card, or refund the money (and they will take the card). i so wanna keep the card that's been with me for 6.5yrs!!!! but well. $16 in the card. well well. GOODBYE EZ-LINK CARD!

this week is not gonna be any better. pls let me finish all my work!!!!

2008-06-30T08:54:00.002+08:00

Grandma's Birthday Celebration!!!! :)

it was a fantastic dinner with all the good food!!! we all went home with BLOATED STOMACH!! chocolate cake from intercontinental (dear cousin asked: hotel? my reply: nono. intercontinental confectionery. STUPID QUESTION!!!) was yummilicious!

2008-06-28T14:42:00.003+08:00

hi hi my dear everyone!!!! the week of work cant be less tiring! well well. almost everyone in DJ MXS who is gg uni have stopped working!! lil pathetic me is still stuck at work! GGRRRRRRR.

I SKIPPED WORK YEST!
=) went for medical check up at forest. on the way back to boon lay mrt, i called jf to ask abt her sweet bf bday celebration. then, suddenly, there was a few seconds of silence. i thot i lost her or smth. then this crazy girl screamed! okok. NUS FASS ACCEPTED HER AFT HER APPEAL! she's just a super lucky girl! aft gg thru so much in her application for uni, FINALLY! so say goodbye to "ITS ALL ABOUT MONEY SCHOOL!"

ltr in the evening, we had STEAMBOAT! mind you! i stink so much when i reached hm! anyway, we're sort of in this steamboat fanatic period. we keep gg back to the same place for the past 2 months? GIRLS! ITS TIME FOR A CHANGE!

OOOOOOOMMMMMMMMM. i love that harmonious feeling. ;)

wth!!!! pyss announced that melvyn lee from temasek jc got 4 As in his A lvls! "the school set such good foundation for him that made him do well in ur tertiary education" EXCUSE ME! he's not lk the only one who got As ok!? YEEEKKKK! not lk i got 4 As. but if u add PW, CHI, I ALSO HAVE 4 As WHAT! so does marilyn, jf and derr have As! at least MATH/ CHI/ PW!!!
HE'S FOREVER MY NO 1 ENERMY!

2008-06-22T12:26:00.003+08:00

OOOOOOOMMMMMMM.... haha. that HARMONIOUS FEELING. its always retarded being with them. but moments always seem so precious yet short.

first of all, like FINALLY, penguin 替我们争口气! you don't bully zoo-keeper yah?; if not, he may not feed you food. but if that zoo-keeper is to bully you, the rest of the animals (not that im referring ourselves as animals. ILLUSTRATION PURPOSES ONLY!) will support you all the way!!!!!! :)

so yest was a gathering with this group of ppl who I uber uber love to the max! lunch at ikea, chit chatting at my place, dinner by siglap, and back to my hse sitting in a "romantic corner" with the fishes, flowers, and fountain. and best of all, ITS FULL ATTENDANCE!

uni is starting so soon, lk in 1 mths time, its starting to tickle me abit. what kind of life will that be lk? staying in halls, meeting new ppl, being away from home, mugging hard AGAIN (not that i really did mug hard in the past). so exciting, yet abit scared and held back. LIFE GOES ON RIGHT? ;) i only hope for the best.

so its countdown 2-3 more weeks for me to complete my mountain load of work!

2008-06-19T16:03:00.002+08:00

i was flipping through the things in the drawer, and i came across this (look below!!!!)

don't you think we all look so natural, young and happy?! ;)

then i saw melvyn (2nd row from the top, 3rd from the right). just look at the way he's pointing; i just thought he's the most outstanding one. he looks as if he's the teacher going into the class and pointing at a student saying "YOU!" the rest of us look as if we're happily smiling saying "YAY!" or "YO!". so i burst into laughter. sis thought i was crazy. but when she saw it, she laughed too!

how young and cute we all look at that time?! not as if we're very old now. but, HAHA!

they are ultimately still the best ppl in my life!

2008-06-15T22:37:00.003+08:00

我会来了!! ;) spore's still the best man! had a great trip in tw for 5 days. 5 days had been full of adventure n fun. there's plenty of food in tw but we don't love all of them. some have a weird weird "tw smell", while others taste not bad. shopping is just lk paradise! skin care, cosmetics, clothes, shoes, i shopped till i almost drop. haha. i will will go back for shopping. if i can only bring 1 thing there besides money, ill bring chili sauce. THEY DON'T SERVE CHILI SAUCE IN MAC! OMG.....

tw is such an environmental country. you have to switch off ur car engine if you're parking by the road side to wait for someone = no aircon for those waiting in the car. they don't give you plastic bags in watsons unless you buy sanitary pads. the toilet papers and facial tissue in the airport toilets are made of recycled paper. they have shops that sell environmentally friendly made products. they encourage ppl to bring shopping bags out by making you pay for plastic bags.

so i'll get ppl to go hk n tw with me next yr!!! shop shop shop. YAY!!

dj mxs: lets have a meeting coming week! there's food for all! :) n we have to listen to wat penguin's got to say!!! *so excited....*

2008-06-13T09:35:00.003+08:00

hi everyone!! ;) im in tw now! its totally so cool here. uber shopping paradise. ill sure come back again for more more more shopping. great variety of food, but not all of them suit our taste buds. anyway, tell u guys more when im back!

2008-06-08T19:26:00.001+08:00

i passed my ftt!! ;) pt is on 26/9. i pray i pray, that i'll pass once and for all.

im utter busy n tired for the entire week, i dunno how to even put it in words. i missed sex and the city with the folks :( and i slept at 4 that friday night / saturday morning bc i had to complete my work, and had to wake up at 830 for driving lessons. argh!

grandma quit smoking!! :) its good news for everyone. i was in my uncle's car this morning on the way to pray my grandpa, when my aunt n grandma were talking abt brushing teeth. aunt commented tat her(grandma's) teeth is considered pretty good considering the fact that she drink coffee regularly and she smokes. then she(grandma) happily proclaimed that SHE'S QUIT SMOKING!!!!! =) everyone was surprised. but i recalled my maid telling me that grandma's been smoking lesser recently. so we asked her why she quit smoking, and her reason was

getting very expensive. for the fact that she smokes 100++ cigarettes every month, she's spending plenty money on cigarettes
some of her mahjong kakis have quit. so she thot she shd join them to quit tgt.

so peer pressure totally works even up to old age! haha. govt's campaign towards promoting "quit smoking" have indeed been effective! when we announced to the family during dinner, everyone was surprised. no one knew she quit smoking! even my auntie who's the closest to her! so those in the car were the 1st to know.

in the past, we thot it'll be very difficult for ask the elderlies to quit smoking, since they have been addicted to it all their life. if we pressure them to quit, they may suffer from other diseases or sicknesses due to being deprived from the addict; since its alr been part of their lives. so its indeed very rejoicing to know that grandma have quit smoking! for the benefit of herself and the entire family, KUDOS GRANDMA! =)

flying off to tw on 10/6! =)

2008-06-02T22:13:00.003+08:00

2008-05-31T22:37:00.003+08:00

gosh! i think i've made too many emotional entries lately. =)

anyway, let me share a lil part of my working experince. i have worked in my dad's office probably since i started learning at the age of 5-6. when i was young, that was my lil playground. i run ard, sit ard, and watch others work. i even got cut by penknife when i played with it. as i grew older, i took up more responsibilities. i helped out in the yr end, to take calls and orders. i slowly learnt more and more. from office to productions.

i started to become more n more professional since my upper sec times, partly bc im matured enuf to know what is gg on. this yr, in these 6-7 mths that i've spent with the company, i've learnt even more. i've been given more tasks to accomplish. n i tackled them in my own ways. nth was much of an obstacle to me, bc i knew my job scope well enuf, and i know how to communicate with others well enuf.

then, i met with a problem. people. people that i get to meet. customers goes without saying, is a natural irritant to all svc providors. but when u serve with a pride, a smile, a confidence, there's no prob handling them. but there r just a certain group of people that r difficult to handle.

everyone have probably met some pushy salesperson in the shopping centres, those that come to your door to promote, or even the telemarketers. but these ppl come n go. for my case, they (the sales person of some product that my company is considering to take up) can pester me up to 3 times a week, causing a hassle and pressure in my life, that makes me feel like leaving my job sometimes. its not totally their fault to promote and push their customers to purchase their products. but daddy was indeed not decided or not in the rush to confirm. plus the company had other priorities and projects that r ongoing. so i could only report to my dad everytime these ppl give us a better offer. but daddy would nv be able to decide or give me a firm ans. so i have to delay n delay. somehow, they lk to call n call, push n push, up to an extend that i fear to pick up calls. n up till today, i still fear picking up the phone.

another type of ppl that i met was customers that dont pay up. i had a chance to go for a meeting with a printing firm, to ask them to settle the payment. we met with the MD, and he started comparing prices to say that we are expensive. he blamed his managers and purchasers for having purchased our svc at high prices compared to our competitors, but mind you, they had quotations beforehand and he only compared the prices aft they received their goods. so its equivalent to gg to a restaurant to have a sumptuous meal, but after you finish your meal, you go next door to look at their prices, and then tell the waiter that their prices r higher. THEN DONT YOU KNOW HOW TO LOOK AND COMPARE THE PRICES BEFORE YOU ENTER? they must have definitely put in other considerations lk SERVICE, QUALITY, ETC! and his argument for us to lower our prices, was that given for the no of years that they have worked with us, we would have definitely earned alot from them, and it wouldnt be too much for us to lower our prices. HOHOHO. what a joke. dear sir, you r not a freshie in the market and r u sure dont compare and check prices before you purchase the goods?! argh! then we went back for discussions and due to the tight n busy schedule of the MD, we always had to push n push N PUSH our meetings back back for weeks. there are other issues discussed in various meetings that we met. but lil of whatever he's said had seem valid to me. when i rebutted, i just felt my blood level increasing all the way to my head. but he taught me a lesson. a good lesson that ill rmb. BOSSES ARE SIMPLY SCHEMING PPL. it can be seen frm all his words that he's actually very calculative. but im sorry sir. bc i can read that mind of yours too. THEY PUT WORDS VERY NICELY TO MAKE THEM SOUND GOOD, BUT ACTUALLY THEY JUST THOUGHT REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY WORKS.

at the age of 18, i've seen many faces of the world and i alr know many things that wont suppose to be known or wont be known to an 18 yrs old. there are times when i simply wanna be navie, lk when im with the family, or times that i just wanna keep quiet or i choose not to say it. but at the back of my mind, its nv shut. bc i have to constantly look out for myself and for others. i have to look out for my sis n mum, bc they can be really blur. i have to look out for my friends, so that we dont walk in the wrong directions or make the wrong decisions. its very tiring sometimes. bc i always have to be prepared for the worst to happen on me, just in case i become the only person left among the family or friends. i tried to shut off sometimes. but i realised, once i shut off, smth will go wrong. n once, i just shut of for 1 minute. and a mistake was made. but its just my character that doesnt want careless mistakes to happen. sometimes, im too tired to open my eyes.

im sorry if im frank, im sorry if im hash, im sorry if i've hurt you. and im sorry if i looked fierce or strict. bc i've been always analysing n watching out, that i want you to know your mistakes and stop making them again. but tell me, if im the one at fault.

i wanna be remembered for my laughter, i wanna be remembered for my smile. mummy say im just a 开心果. i laugh when im happy, i cry when im sad. sometimes, i just wanna move away from being who i am, n be the youngest of them all. but i nv succeeded in doing so.

and this is a lil part of my life i wanna share with my loved ones. bc i know they care and love me, i wanna repay them the same way. but sometimes, my method may be wrong. if so, pls tell me.

thank you. =) ill cont to smile my way into the rainbows and sunshines of my life.

2008-05-31T21:22:00.004+08:00

hi hi hi everyone! this week had been so tiring on me, i feel so so reluctant to get out of bed every morning to go for work. although i can choose to work in the slackest way for my dad n mum, i chose to be responsible up till i finish my task n go for my uni.

just in case if u're wondering, aft i fought with myself for such a long time, i've decided to go for ntu. it was indeed a difficult decision for myself. but at the very end, i chose ntu. its such a long long story that i wouldnt wanna repeat again. im sorry.

i spent the whole saturday watching one million star. n i cried the entire day. even if i didnt like that competitor that was eliminated in that episode, i still ended up crying at the end when the competitor had to bid farewell with the rest. one of my fav singer Rachel Liang Wen Ying got eliminated in a PK round; so that was pretty disappointing though i knew that she got in again in the revival round. Then came revival round aft 4 PK rounds, and when she sang, i just cried. it was a dialect song, n i totally didnt understand. but somehow, i started to look at the lyrics, and i just cried. she (Liang Wen Ying) started crying aft the chorus too. its just a kind of impact her voice have, that makes you feel what she's singing. n aft i watched 5 episodes in a roll, i realise 2 impt things.

1stly, its when you sing for the world, that makes your world go round. thru all the PK rounds, i can feel the effect of how a song or just how singing can be so influential. it makes u cry subconsciously. it makes you smile so sweetly. it makes you laugh crazily. that's how much a song or singing mean to me. n i realised that i really wanna go back to the choir to sing for myself and for others again. when i was young, i sang bc i can sing. i sang bc i enjoy the ease of singing. but i nv understood what it meant by "a voice that can penetrate thru the heart"; but now, i understand.

2ndly, i saw how much friendship can make someone grow. bc many times, its friends that encourage us and teach us as we grow. in One Million Star, the competitors get eliminated, and they leave their friends in the competition. its the togetherness, learning and growing experiences together that make them so bonded, and thus dread leaving (there's definitely also a passion for singing that comes with it).

so its just the same as how much we feel for our good friends. but we're fortunate that we nv get eliminated and nv have to leave, unless we choose to. so we have to treasure those people who are precious to us. dont cry when they are gg to leave or when they have left. be nice to them when you have them ard.

=)

2008-05-26T23:11:00.003+08:00

many many things happened since i last blogged. let's go day by day...

mummy's birthday!

it was a great supper celebration at the famous joo chiat pepper crab. although we dont think its very nice, it was a nice treat! my sister always lk to describe the pepper crab there as "after you finish eating it, you dont feel that peppery taste in your mouth" and for tat reason; a very impt reason why some pepper crab taste better than others, we rarely visit that place. then we went home, and we presented tat yummy four leaves coco exotic cake; despite it being four leave's famous cake, mummy still thinks tat swensens ice cream cake is delicate and nice- she sure have a sharp tongue for chocolate cakes.

derrick's birthday celebration!

a 1 day advanced celebration, following DJ MXS's 2008 birthday theme of a cozy celebration. headed to far east for ramen ten; the super spicy ramen there is ohmygosh. then we headed for a 930 to 130 singing at party world. i was uber enthusiastic tat nite, and my lungs were just so strong n active- i sang sang n sang. even without the mic, i could be louder than the rest. at 12, the bday song came together with the "derrick self picked cake". the cake is similar to four leave's coco exotic but somehow it taste better; its Guanaja from Rive Gauche located at taka b2. there are other yummy-licious cakes avail there, and it seems lk they are good at their strawberry shortcake. their oreo cheesecake look uber tempting to me too.

girl's day out!

the next day, all the girls met up again aft noon to go the temple @ waterloo/ bugis. i went there to ask abt my uni. it appeared tat one is good, the other's not. but somehow, everyone's asking me to go to ntu. i know wat i have with me. after thinking for a few days, im probably gg to make up my mind tmr. its a tough tough decision. esp when its so far away.

we headed back to bugis to shop for sunscreen lotion. had multiple brands tested on me. but up till now, im still abit clueless abt wat i wanna get. but big nono goes to bad sunscreen smell; i simply can take tat yeeking sunscreen smell. shopped aimlessly for awhile, had dessert, some girls went for steamboat, others went to meet up with family. n i got my storybook, aft i stopped reading lk ages.

went to meet my family for dinner with my dad's hk friend. everytime he comes to spore, he'll always look for daddy. its been lk 20 yrs of friendship; so he sort of see me grow- but perhaps once to twice a yr.

one million star 超级星光大道

i spent the whole of sunday watching one million star at home . i've been super addicted to the second series, and had been watching it on such a frequent basis lately, such tat mum starts to wonder wat's so nice abt it. i think the competition is so healthy and educational; the competitors go thru rounds of singing competition based on different themes every week, and judging is fully based on the experienced judges (NO VOTING!!!!).

i think what really attracts me is firstly, its a singing competition; bc i love singing, this totally appeals to me. secondly, they not only sing mandarin songs, but western songs. =) thirdly, i totally like the way tat judging is fair n based on ability but not popularity, plus the judges are professional! forth, thru the different episodes tat i watched, i can see the competitors learn more singing techniques and even skills (e.g. they learn to dance and sing in a different lang). there's just so much to being a singer than just singing. lastly, its a healthy competition as in they build friendships, learn and grow together; there's just so many emotions and feelings tat comes with it.

this show had indeed been entertaining for me bc i cried and laughed with it. some of the songs are so touching, and i somehow, ALWAYS CRY when they eliminate someone. call me sensitive or watever. but i can feel tt friendship between the competitors, that learning experience they gain from that competition, and tat reluctance to leave the stage.

one uber memorable experience with the show is when one competitor sang the italian and chinese version of "Time to say Goodbye". i nv had such great attachment with that song till my grandfather passed away last yr. i can strongly recall tt moment when the family was to see him for the last time before they close the coffin, the band actually played the song "time to say goodbye". at tat time, that song totally made me burst into tears, despite trying to hold them back. although im not very close to him, that song made me recall tat moment, and many other times the family spent with him. tat's how impactful the competitors on the competition can sing, to influence the audience; i can feel the meaning to tat song.

there's much more i wanna share, but work had been taking away alot of my energy.
n ppl i meet at work are just, ARGH! beyond description; they always make my blood boil and tickle my nerves. ill share another time.

像爱却又说不上爱

2008-05-22T00:41:00.013+08:00

happy happy birthday to the most important woman in my life!

for there is nth i can use to describe how much you mean to me,

i can only say

"I ♥ MUMMY A PLENTY!"

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

omg! where did u go?! did u disappear from earth or smth?!
WHERE ARE YOU?!
its like a super loud cry from the heart.